I've Never Managed the Money in My Relationship. How Do I Buy a Home on My Own?

For 14 years, your husband dealt with the mortgage.

You knew roughly what the repayments were, but you couldn't tell me the interest rate.

When the fixed rate ended, he dealt with the bank.

When you refinanced, he filled out the paperwork.

It wasn't that you weren't interested in money. It was simply how things worked in your relationship.

Now you're separated.

You're 41, earning $105,000 a year, and you've received $180,000 from your property settlement.

You want to buy a home for you and your kids.

Except you've never applied for a home loan by yourself.

And suddenly, something that should feel exciting feels completely overwhelming and a little scary.

Where do you even start?

Let's talk about it.

This is an illustrative scenario, but the questions are relevant to anyone buying independently for the first time.

First, you don't need to know anything about mortgages

I mean that.

You don't need to understand interest rates, offset accounts, loan-to-value ratios or which bank has the best home loan.

You don't even need to know how much you can borrow.

That's what a mortgage broker (me) helps you work through.

The first conversation should always be about you.

What you earn. What you've saved. What your expenses look like. And what kind of property you'd like to buy.

Then we work backwards from there.

Can I get a home loan if I've never applied for one myself?

Yes.

There's no requirement to have previously held a mortgage independently before applying for a home loan.

A lender is primarily interested in your current financial circumstances and whether you can afford the proposed repayments.

Let's use your $105,000 salary as an example.

You have $180,000 available from your settlement, no personal loans and one child who lives with you.

A lender will consider your income, existing financial commitments, living expenses and dependants.

It will also consider your credit history and the proposed loan amount.

Your previous experience managing a mortgage isn't what determines whether you qualify.

The Australian Government's MoneySmart home-buying guide explains the financial factors lenders consider when assessing a home loan.

How much could I borrow on a $105,000 salary?

This is usually one of the first questions I'm asked.

And I understand why.

You want to know whether you're looking at a $600,000 apartment or whether something closer to $800,000 might be possible.

But I wouldn't give you a borrowing figure based on your salary alone.

Here's why.

Two women earning $105,000 can have completely different borrowing capacities.

One might have no children, no debts and relatively low living expenses.

The other might have two children, childcare fees, a car loan and a $15,000 credit card limit.

Same salary.

Very different financial commitments.

And different lenders can assess those circumstances differently.

I've explained this further in my article:

Why Has My Borrowing Capacity Dropped Even Though My Salary Hasn't Changed?

The important thing is understanding your individual borrowing capacity before you start seriously looking at properties.

What if I don't have much credit history in my own name?

Perhaps your former partner always held the credit cards.

The car loan was in his name.

And while you contributed financially to the household, you've never personally applied for much credit.

You might be worried that a bank won't lend to you because you don't have an extensive credit history.

But having limited credit history may work in your favour.

Lenders consider your overall financial position, including your income, existing debts, repayment history and ability to service the proposed loan.

In Australia, you don't need to take out a credit card or personal loan simply to demonstrate that you can manage debt.

In fact, taking on unnecessary debt could reduce your borrowing capacity.

And if you already have a credit card, even one you pay off every month, its limit can affect your application.

I've written about that here:

Does My Credit Card Limit Affect How Much I Can Borrow If I Owe Nothing?

What documents will I need to apply for a home loan?

This is probably the part that feels most intimidating when you've never handled the paperwork.

But it's generally more straightforward than you might expect.

For someone earning a regular salary, I'd usually start by asking for:

• Your two most recent payslips.
• Identification documents(passport, drivers license, medicare card)
• Recent bank statements showing your income and expenses.
• Evidence of your savings or available deposit.
• Details of any existing loans or credit cards.

Relevant documentation confirming your property settlement funds, where applicable.

Depending on your circumstances, the lender may request additional information.

For example, if you receive child support or other income, we may need documentation to establish whether the lender can include it in your borrowing capacity.

The point is, you don't need to work out what every lender requires.

I'll tell you what we need and why.

I've got $180,000. Should I use all of it as my deposit?

Not necessarily.

And this is something I'd want to talk through carefully.

Let's say you're considering a $700,000 apartment.

You might be tempted to put almost every dollar of your $180,000 towards the purchase.

But buying a property involves more than the deposit.

Depending on your circumstances, you may also need to pay stamp duty, conveyancing fees, inspection costs and moving expenses.

Then there are the ongoing costs of owning the property.

Council rates.

Strata levies if you're buying an apartment.

Insurance.

Maintenance.

And, of course, your mortgage repayments.

I'd also want you to think about how much money you'd have left after settlement.

Because having your own home is wonderful.

But having a mortgage and absolutely no financial breathing room isn't necessarily the outcome we're aiming for.

What happens once I know how much I can borrow?

The right deposit amount depends on your circumstances, the lender's requirements and what you feel comfortable retaining in savings.

What if I'm nervous about making such a big decision alone?

I think this is something we don't talk about enough.

When you've spent years making financial decisions with another person, buying a property independently can feel like an enormous responsibility.

You might worry about choosing the wrong lender.

Paying too much for a property.

Or committing to repayments that become difficult to manage.

And perhaps you're used to having someone else make the final decision.

But you don't need to become a mortgage expert overnight.

A good broker (me) should explain the options, the costs and the trade-offs so you understand what you're agreeing to.

For example, I wouldn't recommend a particular lender simply because it offers the highest borrowing capacity.

I'd also look at the interest rate, fees, loan features and whether the repayments make sense for your circumstances.

Because being approved for a mortgage and being comfortable with a mortgage are two very different things.

What happens once I know how much I can borrow?

Once we've assessed your borrowing capacity and deposit, we can establish a realistic purchase budget.

From there, we can discuss whether obtaining pre-approval makes sense.

A pre-approval is an indication that a lender may be prepared to lend you a certain amount, subject to its conditions and final assessment.

It isn't a guarantee of finance.

But it can give you a clearer starting point when looking at properties.

You don't have to know everything before you start.

Maybe your former partner always handled the mortgage.

Maybe you've never spoken to a bank about borrowing money.

Maybe the thought of making a $700,000 property decision by yourself feels terrifying.

That's understandable.

But not having managed the finances in your relationship doesn't mean you're incapable of managing them now.

You have an income.

You have financial goals.

And you can learn what you need to know.

You don't need to have every answer before having your first conversation with a mortgage broker.

That's where we start.

Want to know what buying on your own could look like?

I'm Eshanee Collins, a Sydney mortgage broker and founder of April Six.

I help people understand their borrowing capacity, compare lenders and navigate buying property without making the process unnecessarily complicated.

If you're buying on your own for the first time, particularly after a significant change in your life, I'm happy to walk you through the process.

We can look at your income, deposit and expenses, and work out what options might be available.

No pressure. No expectation that you already understand how mortgages work.

Just a conversation about where you are and where you'd like to be.

You can chat to Eshanee by clicking here.

Additional Resources:

MoneySmart – Buying a House

MoneySmart – Ways to Buy a Home Sooner

MoneySmart – Divorce and Separation Financial Checklist

Any information or advice contained on the April Six Pty Ltd website is general in nature only and has been prepared without considering your individual personal objectives, financial situation or requirements. Before acting or relying on this information, you must consider the appropriateness of this information with regard to your individual circumstances and objectives.

April Six Pty Ltd is a Credit Representative of Astute Financial Management Pty Ltd | Australian Credit Licence 364253

© April Six Pty Ltd | ACN: 667183735 | Credit Representative Number 554762

Eshanee Collins is the founder of April Six, a Sydney-based mortgage broker for first home buyers and first-time property investors across Australia.

📱 0488 471 888 | @eshanee_thebroker | aprilsix.com.au